How pathetic is this: went out to feed Buddy today and Brad was in town for about 5 minutes to straighten out the final things for moving out of his apartment, so he met me out there to see the new arena. I hosed Buddy down cause he was covered in fly bites and sweat (its 101 degrees with a 115 heat index) and set him up with his food. Then Brad and I drove down to the arena to check it out for a few minutes and say hi to Jeff and Gina. When I came back up, Buddy was done eating and just standing in the breezeway of the barn watching me. He had the saddest look on his face standing next to his empty feed pan. This overwhelming motherly feeling kicked in and I had to give him a hug. I've always felt that its the most depressing feeling is eating a nice meal all by yourself. No one should ever have to eat a nicely prepared meal alone. I used to absolutely hate it when I'd come home from working a long day at the barn to a dark apartment and have to eat dinner alone while waiting for my ex-boyfriend to come home from a gig.
That look Buddy gave me broke my heart. Sorry big guy, didn't mean to treat you like a chore. I know I'm insanely busy, but it'll all be cleared up by tomorrow night. Then its Buddy/Krisann time again. Gonna spend tons of time with him while Nicole's in town, then I have a few days of just work, no class, til I go on vacation. When Buddy first came down to Carbondale I used to sit in the pasture on his round bale for hours just watching him. Thats how I spent my Christmas Eve AND Christmas Day. I had to work double shifts at the Kennel and was in Cdale without friends or family to spend the holiday with. Sitting against a round bale with a book in my hands and Buddy munching hay next to my boot was the first time I remember feeling not alone in the world.
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